rude quotes page 6

140 char,    160 char,    All length

, 82 character

What do men and beer bottles have in common? They are both empty from the neck up.

      

, 85 character

Why do only 10% of men make it to heaven? Because if they all went, it would be Hell.

      

, 42 character

Hi there, I'm a human being! What are you?

      

, 91 character

Remember a sense of humor does not mean that you tell him jokes, it means you laugh at his.

      

, 71 character

How can you tell which is the head nurse? The one with the dirty knees.

      

, 104 character

Do you know why beer goes through your system so fast? Because it does not have to stop to change color.

      

, 109 character

A woman is like a well-served table at which a man looks one way before he eats and differently after he ate.

      

, 65 character

I'm multi-talented: I can talk and piss you off at the same time.

      

, 62 character

I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me.

      

, 100 character

Why do doctors slap babies' butts right after they're born? To knock the penises off the smart ones.