rude quotes page 1

140 char,    160 char,    All length

, 83 character

You know you're ugly when it comes to a group picture and they hand you the camera.


, 59 character

I don't think you act stupid, I'm sure it's the real thing.


, 89 character

Sometimes the first step to forgiveness, is realising the other person was born an idiot.


, 69 character

Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? Ask your mother.


, 84 character

What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? Slow down and use a lubricant.


, 67 character

How can you spot the blind guy at the nudist colony? It's not hard.


, 73 character

What do you call an Amish guy with his hand up a horse's ass? A mechanic!


, 99 character

How do you embarrass an archeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.


, 87 character

It's better to let someone think you are an Idiot than to open your mouth and prove it.


, 50 character

If I'd shot you sooner, I'd be out of jail by now.

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