retirement quotes page 1

140 char,    160 char,    All length

, 81 character

Why do Retirees smile all the time? Because they can't hear a word you're saying!


, 65 character

Retirement is the time in your life when time is no longer money.


, 73 character

Money isn't everything but it sure keeps you in touch with your children.


, 39 character

If the music's too loud you're too old.


, 72 character

Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them while driving.


, 55 character

Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.


, 74 character

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.


, 58 character

Are you always this stupid or is today a special occasion?


, 99 character

How can you tell that you're getting old? You go to an antique auction and three people bid on you!


, 98 character

The reason grandchildren and grandparents get along so well is because they have a common "enemy".

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