I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
I named my hard drive "dat ass" so once a month my computer asks if I want to 'back dat ass up'.
I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect".
What was Forrest Gump's email password? "1forrest1"
A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
A clean house is the sign of a broken computer.
What does a baby computer call its father? Data.
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
My New Years resolution is 1080p.
What's the difference between a blonde and a computer? You only have to punch information into a computer once.