Anyone have any sex laying around they're not using I could borrow?
I flirted with disaster last night. Now disaster won't stop texting me.
For my next trick I need a condom and a volunteer...
You are the reason Santa even has a naughty list.
What did the chocolate syrup say to the ice cream? "I'm sweet on you!"
I love every bone in your body, especially mine.
I'll be Burger King and you be McDonald's. I'll have it my way, and you'll be lovin' it.
Did you get those yoga pants on sale? Because at my house they're 100% off,
You smell like trash..... Can I take you out?
My favorite sexual position: The Chilean miner. That's where you go down on me and stay there till Christmas.