dirty quotes page 11

140 char,    160 char,    All length

, 87 character

What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business? 1. No mind. 2. No business.

      

, 53 character

What's long, black and smelly? The unemployment line.

      

, 76 character

How do you fix a woman's watch? Why should you? There's a clock on the oven.

      

, 42 character

Want to take a look at my benefit package?

      

, 134 character

Why do women have smaller feet than men? It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.

      

, 109 character

What's the definition of a male chauvinist pig? A man who hates every bone in a woman's body, except his own.

      

, 58 character

Looking at you is getting my dick harder than Chuck Norris

      

, 86 character

My dad used to always warn me about anal. He would say "Now son, this may hurt a bit".

      

, 128 character

How are women and linoleum floors alike? You lay them right the first time and you can walk all over them for the next 20 years.

      

, 63 character

Why'd the semen cross the road? I wore the wrong pair of socks.