As best man it is my job to tell you about the groom, and all the embarrassing things that have happened to him in the 28 years leading up to what was the happiest day of his life until i started this speech.
I organized a threesome for (NAME)'s last night of freedom. There were a couple of no-shows, but he still had fun.
It's not often that one gets the opportunity to speak about someone intelligent, respected and admired. Unfortunately tonight I have to talk about (NAME).
He was in a pub when he proposed. It was very romantic – he got up on one knee.
My speech today will be like a mini-skirt. Long enough to cover the essentials but short enough to hold your attention!
(NAME) is a terrific athlete. He recently ran the London Marathon – he was aiming for 3 hours but just missed it! he made it in 3 hrs 150 minutes
At school he used to enjoy streaking. On it's own, not a particularly interesting fact, until you consider he was at an ALL BOYS boarding school.
Ladies and gentlemen, if there's anybody here this afternoon who's feeling nervous, apprehensive and queasy at the thought of what lies ahead, it's probably because you have just got married to (NAME).
(NAME) spent most of his university days single But it was by choice. Woman chose not to date him.
I'd like to start today by telling you how wonderful (NAME) is. I'd like to but...